Works by
John Warner
(Writer)
[July 16, 1968 - ]

Non-fiction

• Fondling Your Muse: Infallible Advice From a Published Author to the Writerly Aspirant (2005)
  Fondling Your Muse is John Warner's innovative and slightly insane book of instruction for those who want to write, and those who think they already can. It's packed with quirky (possibly deranged) advice guaranteed to make you laugh out loud in the most embarrassing fashion possible. You know what we mean. It also includes a special chapter entitled "Everything Stephen King Knows About Writing Successfully: Plus Some Things I Know That He Doesn't Because He Isn't That Special." No other book currently available has this chapter!
  
  And Fondling Your Muse provides the kind of wise, insightful guidance that's missing from all of those self-serious, mind-numbingly awful books that promise riches and fame by writing only 20 minutes a day.

• Created in Darkness by Troubled Americans: The Best of McSweeney's, Humor Category (2004), Dave Eggers, John Warner, Kevin Shay, Lee Epstein, eand Suzanne Kleid, eds.
  Now more than ever, Americans are troubled by questions. As sweaty modernity thrusts itself upon us, the veil of ignorance that cloaked our nation hangs in tatters, tattered tatters. Our “funny bones” are neither fun nor bony. Glum is the new giddy, and the old giddy wasn’t too giddy to begin with.
  
  What can be done to stop this relentless march of drabbery? Not much. Nothing we can think of. It’s pretty much too late. The light of August turns to the overcast skies of autumn, and the taunting sting of winter cannot be far ahead on the highway of the road on the horizon. Who can sing a song without words? Maybe Bobby McFerrin, but is there anyone else? Where do we go when the party is over? Perhaps the afterparty. But what comes after the afterparty?
  
  Questions, there are so many questions, and then some queries, arriving via fax. To these we respond in the only way possible: Talk to the hand, because the face ain’t listening. Nevertheless, we present the pages within as an offering of peace, as a message of hope, and as a perfumed hankie of love—a hankie drizzled with the intoxicating aroma that has only one name: ha-ha-oopsie.

• Modern Humorist's My First Presidentiary (2001) by Kevin Guilfoile with John Warner

Other

• May Contain Nuts: A Very Loose Canon of American Humor  (2003) by Michael J. Rosen
  See "The New York Times Book Section Reviews My First High School Date" by John Warner and " The Columbia Letters" by John Warner and Kevin Guilfoile.